Happy Orphans Day !

If you didn't know it is Mothers day, at least here in New Zealand. It is a good day for many, celebrating our mothers or those who play mothers in or life. Yet not all women can be mothers, and not all children have mothers for many reasons. 

Being one of those people is potentially quite a tough day, it is not always easy dealing with the feelings around being a mother or your mother no longer in your life. And some have bad memories of mothers, others have children in care, some can't have children, others have had children die. Then there are those who step up and play the role of a mother because a mother figure is required in some child's life.

So today I am celebrating the women in my life, none of which is my mother as she passed many years ago. My grandmother passed about 12 years ago. I was able to spend a short time hours before my mothers death as she lay in an induced coma, barely a few hours before she passed. I saw my grandmother a few moths before her death, she was living in a state that is not living, and her cognitive abilities were very diminished. Yet she recognized me, and she heard my words. I have a 25-year old daughter who swaps texts a few times a year, never on days like today or even my birthday. You may say well you were her father after all, which if you knew my past I raised her mostly single handed for the first 6-years of her life.

It is for me a day that still needs to be celebrated. Some how we all came from mothers or we had a mother figure irrespective of gender, age, relationship.

For those of us that fit this category of "orphans" please take a small moment to be thankful that you are here, for the "mothers" in your life, for the absent children, and for those who cannot bear children. 

We "orphans" are people to, and the fact that we don't have children in our lives or mothers, doesn't change the fact that we need to create our own families, often friends, and celebrate ourselves, our children, our "mothers" and that as women we still play a role guiding our communities.

Today I am taking out two orphan friends to celebrate. There will be feelings stirred, some reflecting, and hopefully some good stories and laughter. Most importantly we need good coffee and chocolate.

For my Grandmother, mother, and daughter, you are not forgotten, ever, and I am only here because of you.

Nana & my daughter.

My daughter many years ago.

My mother & grandmother.

Aroha all,

Geogina