The Building Bug & Status Change

It has been quite a break since the last blog post, 5-days in fact. Which I think is to long. Most of this time in New Zealand has been public holidays (bank holiday for some of you) for Easter. It however has not been a holiday for me.

I have been working, for me!

With an upcoming need to move, I have been steadily preparing for this event in the near future. I have teamed up with SR, somebody who has become a friend, and we missed out on a dream property yesterday. Sad, yet we keep on trying. There are other options and we shall keep trying.

This in the recent past was something that was really stressing me. It represents change, a big change in the foundations of my life. I was only seeing the down side, which includes a need for some of the support that has been the scaffolds of my life the last 7 1/2 months. 

The thing is I have grown in this time. Really grown. Back then I needed training wheels, I needed that support to help me get life going in a new life, in a new place, and with every need you can imagine. I have been through many things which have tested me, some surprisingly more than I expected.

I have invoked support as required, and I have shown my ability to cope. There have been moments when I have recognized when my mind has struggled. In reflection I think many people might have felt similar if they had experienced what I have. The difference has been, as my psychologist has said, is that I have an insight into things beyond many people, and I have the ability to do what is needed. And my peer support says she admires my courage.

And he is right. I have grown this ability over the last few years, and it has been motivated by a vision and goal of my future, a plan that has been refined and reinforced. I know what I want and need, I know where I am going, and ultimately nothing will stop me. Once I step into such a plan I become quite focused. Another psychologist once described me as a "guided missile", which sounds harsh, yet there is a degree of truth in it. I would like to think a smart weapon. When it comes to goals I am ultimately unrelenting.

This means I first check and evaluate my goal before I start planning it. And ultimately once I go for it I don't quit. I take setbacks and keep going. And this can be very helpful when things in life are not going to plan or try to upset my path. I ultimately can bring my goals to mind and get myself back on track.

I can see looking back over these 7 1/2 months how this has helped me. So moving is now a goal, and I embrace it.

Given this I have recognized the need to get certain things. I need some furniture, and I want to make my own. I have had a plan to do so for some time, even sketched up ideas, done some research, built up some experience, and now is the time. Two big items are a bed and some drawers or a similar clothes storage means.

And Easter is a good time to do this with it being a very long weekend.

Now where I am living I do not have a workshop or garage. I have a small 2-bedroom flat, and it is crowded with my preparations and stuff. I have a small work bench outside on my deck, which is exposed to the elements. That means the only other space is inside the flat, mostly the kitchen and lounge area.

I am highly adaptive, especially when motivated by a goal. I rearranged the house to create space to work and lay out things. Tools were placed in handy positions. Let the chaos begin.

 

 

And that is the story of my Easter weekend. My house looked like it was on the frontlines of Ukraine, dust, sawdust, tools, timber, all mixed up with rearranged furniture and stuff. Add to that the smell of polyurethane, bacon cooking, and you get some sort of idea.

Not having ideal facilities, every single thing takes longer. Working with pallet wood also has its challenges with the way I like to work with it, I don't refine the wood to a more perfect state. Essentially I like to honour the woods history and enjoy the challenge. My visions of the goal are different to many people, perfection is mine to behold.

 

 

 

 

 

I won't recount the many challenges I faced making these two items, except that I had a planned complication to make the bed a sort of kit set item, making the queen size base easier to move. Both the designs reflect me.

Some of the photos show a little of the chaos before it got really messy. Sunday night for example I had to dig a path to my bedroom and the bed. The only room that stayed clear, clean, and tidy has been the bathroom. I felt it to be the one place I needed to keep clear because basic care of oneself is a real need.

The results I am very happy with. The bed is in kit set form, and I have 2-legs to make. The drawers are in full operation. I am happy. It has been a satisfying experience. It is a peaceful space in my mind as I build, even with power tools. Creating is my happy space, even a space of mindfulness.

The other big change that many have noticed is the change in my relationship status on Facebook. Though I am prepared to make the change of status, I am not prepared to go into details. As Ihave previously mentioned I have a developing situation long distance. Facebook doesn't have a status I like, and this is what I think best sums up the situation. I am not looking elsewhere.

Yes, I am being careful, and yes, I have my eyes wide open, and yes, I am being realistic. And this is why I am talking with some close people as required. I don't want additional feedback, had plenty already. Soon there will be more revelations about things, be patient as I must be. We are talking sensible, openly and honestly. Things are serious. Thats really all everybody needs to know for now. It is my life, and I am taking charge of it, please respect the boundaries and my choices.

Life has started to return to normal after the building boom, and work today was great. I had a yoga session after that and I am now able to do things physically that I have never been able to do. I am stress free, happy, and my body is responding to the changes and gentle coaching. Each session is a time of growth  and reflection, peace, joy. 

Well thats it really. Aroha to you all.

Geogina (the happy)