Success At Last !

I cannot complain. This last weekend was great, the best in ages, productive, restful, recharging, satisfying, joyful.

Happy.

The mind trick I have managed to help with the depression has been improving my daily existence. It is a dangerous trick which I have to monitor. Some people might not get this, it is a trick of the mind. Getting your mind to believe something different to what it already believes to be so is not revolutionary. There are stories of Tibetan Monks, and many others changing the reality in their minds, reprograming themselves if you will.

The trick is not to live to long in that reality lest you forget that it is not the reality. This is what I once did on a regular basis until I had no idea of what reality was and I got into lots of trouble, hurting many people. At the heart of it is a type of lie, and if it is a seductive lie you can become seduced by the power of the dark side. That is why I must be careful. 

It is the purpose you use it for that is most important thing. In my case it is to enable me to get some energy back and to slowly allow myself to deal with issues. It is like creating an alternative scenario where you can pretend or act like certain aspects of the data in your head are different. For me in simple terms that I am feeling confident and not suffering from multiple anxieties, and that the effects of depression do not exist. Keeping the cause's of the depression allows me to work through the issues from a much better perspective.

Once you have resolved the issues the pretending of the alternative life/world is no longer required. Think of it like reprograming the code of your life. The Matrix, or what an athlete does to visualize winning or doing better.

 

 

So Sunday morning was a time to continue the reprograming, taking time to rest and make sure my thoughts are reinforced. I selected a happy state, went back to bed, and appreciate a conversation with a Cricket that has taken residence in my kitchen, appreciating that now there is another lonely soul in the flat, and that I am no longer technically alone. 

Once I got up, I stayed in my nightie until about 2PM. It was just me, the Cricket, and a stuffed toy tiger, a tight bunch of friends. I was on the net, and I was busy making my new Jewellery tree. This was proving fun as a decision I made to the finishing colours proved to be the right one. 

Making stuff is my happy space if I can get to a certain point. I had reached that point where the project was taking shape, and the shape was pleasing. And once you get to this point it is easy to motivate pushing on. Success pushes you to want more success. And thats when I decided to use to colours or paint. I loved it. The design has a turntable allowing it to rotate. It all works for me.

The late shower was because I was going out that evening, early. It was a rainbow community event, a team quiz night. I had arranged with a couple of friendly faces to form a team, and it had merged with a couple of others. I felt comfy, I was with friendly faces, and the conversation over first drinks was good.

 

In the first half I had not much to do. We were running second equal, and our group dropped a few members. All was good. It was in the second half that my obscure knowledge came to the fore. The final total saw us win by 1pt, an amazing finish. We were jubilant. I felt more a part of things by how people reacted to me all evening, even after the event as I mixed and mingled. A number of people had picked that I would be on the winning team. 

 

Back home I checked the net, a bit more food, and then an early night for me.

This morning I felt good and rested, still happy, and I was up and into my day. A rump steak breakfast with mushrooms and kumera chips, plus onions, was breakfast. Live like a Queen. I was off to work on time.

Work was a happy place, and I just get into doing what is needed while we are short staffed. I take a pride in stepping up, and the boss really appreciates my support. Time flew by, and soon it was the end of my shift at midday.

Off to town to a closing down sale, a very large variety store, where I shopped and spent more than I probably should, 50% off is very tempting. I did get some things I had been wanting and needing.

I was called to a meeting with B, a short one discussing looking for housing. I had to reinforce my mind trick after this.

 

 

Back to town, 1 1/2 hours of waiting at a path lab to have blood taken for two separate tests. What a snooze, and I am sure I went to sleep several times among the many people waiting. Still, it was better that getting fidgety or upset like many did. I once learned how to sleep in the back of a moving army truck sitting up years ago.

Next was a mission to get more timber, and that meant pallets. My two regular places were out, and it was a backup place that was loaded. I had a cordless reciprocating saw, two batteries, and the choice of some good pallets. I cut them up to get things easily into the car. I got 4-pallets into the little car this way.

Tonight I have chatted with my new friend from down South, and surfed the net, worked on a new small project I just came up with. I am up late doing this blog, yet happy. I am dealing with A leaving my life and it is becoming much easier. I am feeling like I am making progress in the rainbow community, starting to make friends. Moving is still an issue.

Life is progressing. Life is worth pushing through these hard bits, even if you have to fudge it by reprogramming your life code for a bit.

Aroha all,

Geogina